life on the fence: the distant future

i feel distant, removed, lagging behind. it seems like there's an endless list of things to do - both professionally and personally - that i've almost given up on getting them all done. i like to think of prioritization as an intentional reworking of the order of your list, but in my case prioritization is just the default of procrastinating the things i don't want to do so long that they become urgent. ah, the feel of a deadline crunch. (/sarcasm)

sometimes i feel like i'm just spinning my wheels, never moving ahead, just wearing myself out in the same situations, projects, efforts, health concerns, faith, and desires. is this just a phase - one that we all go through every now and then - or is it a sign of something deeper, perhaps preparation for a new calling or set up for a life change?

i need to learn to be more content. to listen to myself more. to take times of rest. to enjoy what i do now, today, at the present. i'm on the road to discovering that enjoying where i'm at now - with all of its glorious faults - does not limit me from dreaming and planning for the future.